FireDavidHaugh: Summer Solstice Edition (Part II)

There's some event and media, entertainers and others from out of town come to town.  Being in Chicago there's a pretty set list of things they talk about.   Usually there's some talk of deep dish pizza.  Some will reference the Blues Brothers or Superfans.  You'll also get the occasional talk of an Italian Beef or Oprah.  It's repetitive and unoriginal, but they're from out of town and they mean well so its all right.

Then you get a local writer from a major newspaper writing about the Cubs and Sox.  His metaphor, his example, his "angle": The unpredictable Chicago weather!  Yep, that wacky weather-- it rains one minute and is sunny the next.  Who can keep up with it?

But here's The Beta Band.  Dry The Rain.  (I can be clever too).  Article after the song.

Sox, Cubs as predictable as weather

By David Haugh

June 21, 2010

On the first day of summer Monday in Chicago, it rained. It shined. It perfectly reflected the city's two baseball teams that had the day off.

Rained and shined.  The perfect dichotomy this side of Fire & Ice.

Stormy. Mild. Hot. Cold. At least we care about baseball's temperature again around here.

But whose baseball Doppler predicted in April, for instance, that 68 games into the season Gordon Beckham would be hitting .205 andFreddy Garcia and Carlos Silva would lead their respective teams in wins with eight? Or that the Sox team stuck nine games under .500 and 9½ games behind the Twins on June 9 could win 10 of its next 11 to become 34-34?

Who could predict that teams go on streaks?  Or who could've made the bold prediction that 68 games into the season the Sox would be an Earth shattering 34-34? 

Consistency has been so intermittent with the Sox that Tom Skilling could have sat in the booth between Steve Stone and Hawk Harrelson and not missed the rapidly changing pressure patterns he's used to seeing. 

Intermittent consistency-- that sounds like a .500 record.  I also have no idea what the Tom Skilling pressure pattern part is about or whether Skilling is watching the Sox or the weather itself.  (Note to self: Think about working on Hawk-doing-the-weather impersonation)

(Second note to self:  don't let anyone hear it.)

So then there's some more paragraphs where I stay on my Sox being a .500 team bit.

Besides the 2005 World Series, can anybody recall a 12-game stretch of starting pitching as dominant? By the way, pitching coach Don Cooper makes every Chicago sports fan's list of the top-five assistant coaches of the past 25 years, doesn't he?

I didn't realize every Chicago sports fan had a list of top assistant coaches.  I just have a list of assistants to fire in case the team is doing bad.  Sure he can be on the list.  But Phil Jackson was an assistant, he'd be #1.  I always like Ron Adams too.  Dick Pole shouldn't be on the list, but I like his name.  How about Ron Turner for one year?  Ok, this game bores me.  He can be on the list if you want.

Perception is reality, and while Reinsdorf was showing signs of corporate leadership Cubs counterpart Tom Ricketts was showing, well, new signs at the ballpark. While Reinsdorf was getting credit for using his noodle to resolve a crisis, Ricketts was introducing noodle art to the Wrigley Field landscape.

If only there were someone in the city to tell us the difference between perception and reality.  Some sort of scribe who could enlighten the people who only see the media hype.  Isn't Reinsdorf notorious for being cheap?  Ricketts is trying to get as much money as he can to possibly (I hope) add onto a bloated Cubs payroll.  Jerry told his manager and GM to play nice.  

Just checking, this is unacceptable baseball for an organization with a $136 million payroll, right?

Its really unacceptable for any team at any payroll.  However, its not totally a surprise, since they played about this badly last year.

Yes, despite an underachieving 31-38 record and defense worse than the North Korean World Cup soccer team, the Cubs still could rip off a Sox-like streak to get back in contention by the July 31 trade deadline. Snow also could fall in Chicago by then.

Maybe Skilling sees a different extended forecast for the North Side. Meanwhile, I'll start researching connections between Cubs' futility and global warming.

Time to wrap it up with the weather again (and a soccer reference!).  The Cubs could actually be .500 team!  Wow, I'm excited for the season now.  Wait, there's that snow part.  You don't think the Cubs could rage back and have 10 straight days of good baseball.  Fair enough.  

And stop name dropping Tom Skilling.  We know who he is. 

The point of this article: The Sox are back to .500, therefore a far superior team (and organization) to the Cubs.  Simply because of the last 10 games.  Who'll stop the rain (more cleverness).